Better: Through a series of student interviews, I found that Kennedy High School's antibullying program was ineffective.In order to address issues of conflict between students, I argue that Kennedy High School should embrace policies outlined by the California Department of Education (2010).This statement is concise, but it is neither specific nor arguable—a reader might wonder, "Which scholarly articles? Identifying similarities and differences is a good first step, but strong academic argument goes further, analyzing what those similarities and differences might mean or imply.Tags: Essay On Individuality Vs ConformityReflective Essay On Your WritingWebsite EssayPsychiatry Essay Competition UkNew York University Admissions EssayIct Coursework Gcse 2014
In the first example, there are almost no additional questions implied, but the revised example allows for a good deal more exploration.
If you are having trouble getting started, try using the models below to generate a rough model of a thesis statement!
Words like "ineffective" and "argue" show here that the student has clearly thought through the assignment and analyzed the material; he or she is putting forth a specific and debatable position.
The concrete information ("student interviews," "antibullying") further prepares the reader for the body of the paper and demonstrates how the student has addressed the assignment prompt without just restating that language.
The student's paper can now proceed, providing specific pieces of evidence to support the arguable central claim.
There are many words in this sentence that may be buzzwords in the student's field or key terms taken from other texts, but together they do not communicate a clear, specific meaning.means that a scholar in your field could disagree (or perhaps already has! Strong thesis statements address specific intellectual questions, have clear positions, and use a structure that reflects the overall structure of the paper.Read on to learn more about constructing a strong thesis statement. " Additionally, the purpose of the paper—to "examine…to find similarities and differences" is not of a scholarly level.This claim is the type of claim that might be appropriate for the conclusion of a paper, but in the beginning of the paper, the student is left with nowhere to go. If there are "always alternatives" to the problem the student is identifying, then why bother developing a paper around that claim?Ideally, a thesis statement should be complex enough to explore over the length of the entire paper.Notice in the revision that the field is now clear (ecology), and the language has been made much more field-specific ("conservation methods," "green organizations"), so the reader is able to see concretely the ideas the student is communicating.This sample thesis statement makes a claim, but it is not a claim that will sustain extended discussion.If you place the thesis statement at the beginning, your reader may forget or be confused about the main idea by the time he/she reaches the end of the introduction.Remember, a good introduction conceptualizes and anticipates the thesis statement.is the brief articulation of your paper's central argument and purpose.You might hear it referred to as simply a "thesis." Every scholarly paper should have a thesis statement, and strong thesis statements are concise, specific, and arguable.